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Thinking about 2018


I know I know we aren’t there yet. We still have a month before the end of the year but the last few weeks I have be finding myself thinking more about what the year has been about and what next year might hold.

This year has brought me a lot of changes that have challenged me mentally. I moved into a place by myself. Which brought with it a grief fight and a mental battle about being alone.
Changing medication this year has also seen a change in me. ( I’m still working out whether it’s a good dosage at the minute or not )
I got put forward for a uk level 1 coaching award - which I’m still working to complete. But even last year I wouldn’t of said I’d be the right person to do it. So to agree to do it was a huge step for me.

I’ve also got a few commissions in only the last couple of months. And it has been suggested that I start a Facebook page to start selling my work. I seem to be putting that off at the minute. I don’t think I’m mentally ready for it just yet. Maybe the new year.

Yes of course there has been times that I wished I had my beautiful hubby beside me but he isn’t. And that has been another subconscious battle. As I know grow stronger again mentally I wish he could see how far I have come since he left two and a half years ago.

As I look forward to the new year I find myself thinking about what I want to do and keep coming back with needing a challenge. Something that would test me and not fight me mentally. I also keep thinking about how not having anyone to be accountable to in regards to exercise. And how having that might help me even try a bit harder with exercise.
I would love to be able to get into a routine again when it comes to looking after myself daily. Taking time to properly look after my skin etc. With the battle daily mentally I feel that I’ve lost complete control of doing that routine and I know my skin is suffering.

So I guess for me 2019 is looking after me.

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