I’ve put my name down with some persuasion from family to do a craft fair and it’s in a week. This past week I have been fighting an internal negative battle about how I’m not good enough and how people are treating me like I’m so new to selling.
I’ve always suffered with confidence issues, with everything. Whether that be me art or life in general. Having lost the one person that I could totally rely on nearly two years ago to help guide and help me through getting ready to say this fair is a big deal is an understatement.
Me and my sister are total opposites, she has her way of doing things and I have mine. But the way she tried to say something to me during the week made me feel like I hadn’t done a sale before. I was asking for help with an amount needed of something and she said it her way of thinking and got me so confused, I felt like I was 10 again and not able to deal with certain things. The mental battle after that encounter has fuelled the negative comments / thoughts that i have been having. Family members think they are saying things that I haven’t thought about or dealt with previously and I honestly feel like shouting I have done this before you know, yes it may not be this type of art work I have sold but I have done another event that was bigger and managed. They’re making me feel like I can’t cope with life.
This fair is a huge step for me and I think people have forgotten really how much. They don’t get it and I feel like I can’t find the right words to explain it.
I’m in this viscous cycle of negativity at the minute and it’s not helping and I can’t see a way out.
Let’s see how this week goes.
Comments
Post a Comment