So whether I think it or not, I am a fighter.
If these last three and a half years have taught me anything it’s that how ever low I get I still fight on.
There has been more downs than up. More than I’d like to acknowledge.
My thoughts have taken me to places that I didn’t want to go, with ideas that I didn’t really want to have. They have told me that I’m not good enough, not able to draw, that no one will want to get close to me, that I’m damaged after everything that’s happened.
To some that might not seem a big a fight but for me it was huge. Second to the fact that I was dealing with a very sick husband and then his death and the after effects of it. So the fight has been real. So very real.
I’ve always dealt with anxiety, depression, ocd even if I didn’t know it. Add into that ptsd and grief and I can honestly say I’m a fighter, I’m a survivor.
Don’t get me wrong there is times when it gets to much and takes over me. Even though not aware during the low periods deep down I know it will pass.
Here’s to the next chapter in my life and the fight that will come with it.
So to anybody else that is fighting, fighting just to get through the day. Well done, stay strong. And try and believe.
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