Speaking to someone who is going through there own grief at the minute, something they said hit home with me and made me sad that they were thinking it.
“ if I don’t go to sleep at night it means waking up and realising they aren’t here just might not happen”
I have to say that it is so very true. The darkness and lieing in bed by myself, then waking up in the morning and not having just that minute lieing looking at them feeling so content are the hardest and without truly wanting to acknowledge it it is one of the hardest parts of loosing someone.
Even if I don’t get to sleep till late my brain still wants me up at a time when it thinks I should be up. So working only a certain amount of sleep has become common.
The dark nights, lieing trying desperately to sleep my brain goes into think mode and makes me over think everything whether it be large or small. There is only so many times you can listen to the same few audio books without knowing them word for word.
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