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The next couple of weeks

The festive season is turning up the dial and will be in full swing within the next week.

For me that means dealing with anxiety that I know may get to much. It also means dealing with things that might get me down.
A meal with my late husbands family will always bring home that he is no longer here and hasn’t been for some time. It’s a case of finding the strength. There will always be that big elephant in the room when ever we meet. Hopefully it behaves itself this time or there will be words said.

A Christmas party over night with family and all the people that I know but with still an air for me of judging myself and once the dancing starts a wish to head straight to bed. Not a chance to let your head win but sometimes it always does. A black cloud building that could rain on my party.

And the biggest of the couple of weeks. I leave for a three day trip by myself and at the minute I really don’t know how I feel. It’s the first time away by myself and dealing with everyone that intails. With the anxiety more than likely on high and I really hope that it doesn’t put a damper on anything. If I can get through the days away and show myself that I can do it then it will be a huge confidence boost that I can take into the New Year.

The overall thing that will be on my mind will be that a family member is ill in hospital. The guilt is already building about going away but I know they would want me to. But that doesn’t stop it being there.

Here’s to the next couple of weeks and everything that it has to offer.

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