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An emotional week.

Well it’s come that time again that I have to deal with a date that means so much that won’t be getting celebrated. Not the way that it should anyway. My hubby should of been 35 this week but will forever be 32.
It has got easier each year don’t get me wrong. But it’s still a hard day and the lead up to it this year has been hard. But it’s because there is other things happening. Things that I could really do with having him around to sound off to. To get a hug from.
I have a parent who we thought was finished with chemo. Looks like he might not be and that’s hard on all of us, especially him. I also found out a friends husbands cancer has spread.
Life just feels completely shit at the minute and I don’t know how I’m still getting through each day (I know what’s helping anyway - my medication)
I also gave into the internal battle of self harm. 7 months clean and it’s starts from the beginning again.
I feel so lost, sad and confused about everything. I would just love something to make sense.

So here’s to a really shitty end to the week. Hope who ever is reading this is having a better week than me.

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