I've never been popular, I've never classed myself as having a lotta friends.
Since my husband died there has been even more times that I have felt alone. Even with family around me I would feel alone.
Walking down a major UK city street with hundreds of people around I would still feel like I was the only one walking down the street. The pull \ ache in my body would stir a lot of emotions that would try and reach the surface at full speed. It's a normal feeling for me. One that I have to battle with nearly every day. One that sometimes does take over and I have to admit that I some times do let it. Just because I don't have the energy to fight it.
I sometimes wish that I did have more friends around, more people to make the lonley times better. But the other part of me finds it really hard to make friends. To feel that I am being accepted and that I don't have to put my defence barriers up to protect myself.
Since my husband died there has been even more times that I have felt alone. Even with family around me I would feel alone.
Walking down a major UK city street with hundreds of people around I would still feel like I was the only one walking down the street. The pull \ ache in my body would stir a lot of emotions that would try and reach the surface at full speed. It's a normal feeling for me. One that I have to battle with nearly every day. One that sometimes does take over and I have to admit that I some times do let it. Just because I don't have the energy to fight it.
I sometimes wish that I did have more friends around, more people to make the lonley times better. But the other part of me finds it really hard to make friends. To feel that I am being accepted and that I don't have to put my defence barriers up to protect myself.
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